Good Grief

Grief is hard and I’m only twenty-three so honestly I feel like I’ve barely scratched the surface of experiencing and understanding it.

But here is what I know so far; C.S. Lewis said “Love makes us vulnerable to grief”. When we experience grief it is because of a loss of love. A life or relationship ending.

Grief is hard. I cannot pretend that it is not extremely difficult. But my perspective on it is that if you want to avoid grief you need to avoid love. You can’t be vulnerable. You can’t fully experience joy. If you don’t want to risk getting hurt you don’t have to – but you limit the love you feel.

Brené Brown, my personal queen, has a TED Talk about the price we pay when we aren’t willing to be vulnerable. We miss out on a life fully lived. In the talk she says;

“If vulnerability is a sharp edge there may be nothing sharper than joy. To let yourself soften into loving someone, to caring about something passionately, thats vulnerable. … There is a guarantee that no one talks about that and that is if we don’t allow ourselves to experience joy and love we will definitely miss out on filling our reservoir with what we need in those hard things happen.”

I get this rush sometimes when I do things a little out of my comfort zone. I open myself up a bit and feel like “Yes! This is it. I’m doing the thing. I’m living life fearlessly”.

In hard times is easy to feel out of sorts and confused while looking for answers. Looking for an easy way out rather than being stuck sitting with this feeling. If you are sitting on the shore of grief, experiencing the waves, wondering when it will stop being hard – well truthfully I don’t know. But you don’t need to rush through feeling grief, I’m not sure we even can if we want to.

But, I do know it is okay to be sad and honour the significant joy, love and vulnerability that comes from a life fully lived. You followed your heart and said what you needed to say and left it all on the dance floor – or something like that.

The grief we go through is a reflection of a life well lived. A life vulnerable to love. It might be hard, but I consider that the good kind of grief.

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Falling Apart Together

I was riding in the car with my family last weekend and my brother and I were playing around with the idea that commiserating with people is a bit like being “co-miserable”. The act of commiserating with friends when life feels like it is unravelling is a sure way to bond with people.

The stressful moments of dress rehearsals when things are going wrong before opening night.

Seventeen and eighteen year olds who have no idea how to survive their first round of midterms – but get through the allnighters together.

Friends who, due to serendipity or dumb luck, simultaneously go through seasons of grief or heartache and play the role of shoulder to cry on together.

These aren’t particularly easy things to go through, but when we survive them with the support and love of friends we are able to manage better. And sometimes even look on them as happier memories because we shared them with others.

There are some memories that I remember so fondly even though living through them was difficult. There was a day when I was living in Florida when all of the women I was living with were having a bad day. Homesickness, trouble with boys, school stress, the general grind of life; we were all going through our own issues, but we shared the feeling.

We gathered in the kitchen, it started with just a few of us talking while making dinner, but eventually all our roommates joined in. The six of us sat around the kitchen island on bar stools and chairs from the dining room table. We shared mac n cheese, cheesy mashed potatoes and our stories.

These were women who went from perfect strangers to close friends in a matter of months – but a lot of that bonding came from honesty and vulnerability with each other. It came from walking through life together and being able to say when we weren’t having a great day. It doesn’t need to be earth-shattering, but knowing you have permission to say “Can we go get Del’s and drive around listening to Sam Smith in your car?”

We often won’t have the power to fix the problems of the people we love – but we have the ability to show up and create space where it’s okay to not be okay. Where we can admit that life can be heavy sometimes. A place where we can fall apart together – and build each other back up. If that’s not community, I don’t know what is.

The courage to be vulnerable isn’t easy to summon, sometimes it’s 72 hours of a roommate-ship before you’re spilling your biggest secrets and sometimes it’s months of consistent Tuesday night bible studies before we share when we’re having a really bad day.

We build relationships differently with each person we meet, and whenever it feels like you’ve built that appropriate trust, having the courage to be honestly and authentically you is so invaluable.

Since that car ride with my brother I got coffee with a friend and we talked for nearly four hours. It was a beautiful and refreshing feeling to sit with someone and genuinely just share our struggles and triumphs of the recent months. Socially it’s maybe not that common to get so vulnerable with feelings in a coffee shop – but to me that is the heart of friendship; knowing there is space to be honest. Having people in your life who allow you to feel comfortable and supported enough to share the parts of you not everyone gets to see.

There are going to be times in life that things fall apart a bit and life feels like it is unravelling – things just happen and we don’t always have control. But having community makes those times easier.

Maybe it looks like getting Taco Bell in the middle of the night because you can’t sleep, maybe it’s honest phone calls, maybe it’s having the worst day ever and wandering around Target with smoothies, maybe it’s friend’s who come to your rescue as soon as they hear your terrible news, maybe it’s driving around listening to Sam Smith and venting about your feelings, maybe it’s tearing up over London Fogs after you admit to someone who cares that you’ve been having a hard few months – however you cope with the unravelling of life I hope you do it with friends, you can be co-miserable and look back on it later as something that wasn’t so bad.

There’s Power In Love

I sped read through the new Bob Goff book while I was up at my cottage this weekend. It was that perfect type of cottage weather where you could manage a walk on the beach, but then it would be so chilly and you had the perfect excuse to curl up by the fire, drink multiple mugs of hot chocolate and eat a few Timbits (I’ve been indulging in a lot of Timbits since I got home from Florida) for the rest of the day.

Something that stuck out to me while I was reading Everybody Always was this anecdote about “filling up your bucket” he talked about. It actually comes from a children’s book that teaches the lesson of being kind to others, but what he wrote was “we will become in our lives what we put in our buckets”. He realized he needed to stop filling his Das with pride of impatience and really embody the values he wanted to become.

It got me thinking a lot about the areas in my own life where I know I need to step things up. I want to become more loving, more patient and understanding, more empathetic, more generous – and if I want to become that person I need to embody those things even when it feels difficult.


Something I learned from the experience of falling in love is that when you love someone is the feeling of our capacity to love just gets bigger because we didn’t know we could care about someone so much. I’ve heard parents talk about a similar feeling where you think you couldn’t love anything more than you love your partner and when you have a kid a whole new amount of love wells up in you.

It’s like love surprises us – when we thought we couldn’t love people anymore than we do we find out that we can. When you care about someone like that it’s easier to see the best in them. To be a little softer, or gentle, and forgiving. After all, love is patient and forgiving and kind – isn’t it?

When we realize more and more that we have a greater capacity to love than we ever imagined we can try to use it to not only love our significant others or our friends and families – but all the people in our lives that way.

That instinct to see the best in a person? What if we extended that kind of care to everyone? That deliriously in love feeling that makes you wanna dance to work? Can we find that through loving our neighbours and coworkers and friends as generously as we love our significant others? I think we can. I believe when we learn what kind of love we are capable of we can try to extended that in all areas of our lives.


Another perfect thing to do on chilly cottage weekends? Wake up early to watch the Royal Wedding. I rolled out of bed at 6:55 just in time to catch the start of the ceremony (and as soon as it ended I took a 2 1/2 hour nap with my dog – an ideal Saturday morning if you ask me). The ceremony was beautiful but what has really stayed with me was the sermon made by Bishop Michael Curry. He spoke about love, about how the world could look when we act as if love is the way.

Curry said “There’s power in love. Don’t underestimate it. Don’t even over-sentimentalize it.” He spoke about how when we are loved it feels like something is right “when you are loved and you know it, when someone cares for you and you know it, when you love and you show it, it actually feels right.” 

Curry went on to say the reason it feels right when we are loved is because “We were made by a power of love. And our lives were meant and are meant to be lived in that love. That’s why we are here.” One of the first times I heard a Brené Brown TED Talk I remember her saying that the reason we are here is connection. I fully believe both of these things. We are here to connect with others and we are here to share love and be loved through those connections. 

The Bishop went on to encourage the congregation and views to imagine what our communities, countries, families, neighbourhoods and governments would be like when love was the way. He said that when love is the way “we actually treat each other, well, like we are actually family”. Sometimes I think it’s easy to get frustrated with people when they aren’t someone we know or we don’t know their story – but easy isn’t what we are here for and when you try to connect with people and be softer with them we can find ways to extend deep love into all areas of our lives.


I don’t usually give homework assignments, really you just reading to the end of one of my posts is great. But this week I will ask you one thing: think about the values you want to be remembered for – and then ask if you are filling your bucket with that thing. I’m going to work on being understanding and gracious and assuming the best about people, and that’s just the tip of my iceberg.

Think about how loving your friend, neighbour or showing kindness to a stranger really can change the world – There’s power in love. Don’t underestimate it.

Post Christmas Pudge

Everywhere I look I see things that say to enjoy Christmas all you want, indulge in the holidays, but once January 1st hits we need to do the opposite and start diets and going to the gym and doing crazy ab workouts to feel better about the lil holiday pudge we may or may not (definitely have) adopted throughout the Christmas parties, the eggnog flowing and Christmas cookies running wild.

If you’re feeling stress to start a new year’s diet, please take a quick read of this post and evaluate if you still want to (spoiler: I’ll encourage you not to).

 

Body Positivity

Today’s post is the first one where I am writing about body positivity. If you’re not familiar with this here a quick definition;

“The Body Positive Movement is a movement that encourages people to adopt more forgiving and affirming attitudes towards their bodies, with the goal of improving overall health and well-being. Whether people are nurturing their bodies and maintaining their weight, or finding a place in life where they are comfortable through working out, or changing their lifestyles to find a better attitude, the body positive movement focuses on building self-esteem through improving one’s self-image”.

I think this is hugely important in a world full of photoshopped ads and men and women feeling increasingly dissatisfied with how they look to work towards a body positive culture.

There is an Aerie model I really admire named Iskra Lawrence who has become a pretty big spokesperson for body positivity, self-care and self-love in the past few years. She has a fantastic TED Talk I’m linking here where she talks about the importance of dropping the need for perfection and be more gentle with ourselves. In the TED Talk Lawrence talks about how marketing and branding are meant to sell us products. And that to do so marking is meant to make us feel insecure so we will buy the products being sold to us; “If we are insecure, we are a motivated consumer. We can be sold anti-wrinkle cream by 13 years old”.

Lawrence also tracks down the roots of these insecurities and then aims to challenge these insecurities with practicing self-care. “Why is it that we feel these insecurities in the first place? Because from a young age we have been conditioned to believe that our success, and our happiness is highly dependent on our attractiveness”. She encourages her audience to recognize feelings and pressures we face to look a certain way and think about our bodies differently.

 

Balancing Act

There is a lot of research that shows dieting can be harmful, and it’s more important to have an overall healthy life style than to stick to a crash diet or cleanse. So as we enter into the new year when so many people are swearing off carbs or sugar or whatever is trendy – remember that a healthy life style is more important than a quick fix diet. Diets are hugely psychological and can make you feel worse about your self, being on diets makes you lose more muscle than fat and over time diets can make you gain more weight and develop unhealthy psychological patterns and eating habits.

Rather than swinging in the opposite direction from the holiday treats to losing the holiday pudge, it’s better to stick to a balanced life style that is more sustainable. Trying to maintain an overall healthy lifestyle of sleeping right, exercising, drinking lots of water, and eating right (including treats every now and then) is much better for you than dieting. What do I mean by ‘healthy food’ or ‘eating right’? Well, my resident nutrition wizard/ kin student/ cherished friend Emilia says that “sticking to mostly whole foods, incorporating lots of vegetables, homemade foods – enough treats and junk food to keep you sane” is a good start.

I will just say this – please don’t stress. Healthy life styles are better and more effective than crash dieting, and healthy life styles include letting ourselves indulge in treats every once in a while. For more tips on living finding the right balance for you, for life in general, I found this article helpful!

Don’t Turn Christmas Into A Lifestyle

(But don’t forget to indulge either)

The biggest thing I can encourage you to do is not to feel guilty for treating yourself over the holidays and reacting by feeling the need to work it all off at the gym next week. It’s important to remember that we don’t have to feel bad about indulging over the holidays, we should be grateful that we get to.  Yes maybe we went a little overboard on the amount cinnamon coffee cake and hot chocolate but that’s a blessing to be able to enjoy that.

It’s okay if you’ve got a little post-Christmas pudge because your body will balance out, but even more than that, because you aren’t defined by your body. There is no ideal way we should look, perfection is unattainable and the cost of trying to attain perfection is detrimental to both our mental and physical health. A line I love from Iskra’s TED Talk when she is emphasizing the importance of redefining beauty to celebrate personality, morals, values, achievements rather than a person’s appearance is: “We need to stop trying to attain perfection because we are good enough already”. 

So, on top of trying to find a healthy balanced life style (because as much I would like  eggnog and cookies to be my breakfast everyday I know my lactose intolerant body couldn’t deal) I think remembering to practice self-care is important, especially if you’re feeling self-conscious about the way you look. Iskra suggests two activities that can help with this:

  1. Mirror challenge: pick our 5 things you love about yourself. 5 things that you love about your body for what it does for you (rather than what you look like).
  2. Gratitude list: knowledge of what you are lucky for in your life. Refuse to let things like clothes/ looks ruin your day or challenge the knowledge that you have about how great your life is.

 

As we move through holiday celebration remember that it’s a priviliege to have time with family and indulge in holiday treats, and if you have adopted a lil holiday pudge in the last few weeks (or if you’re still wokring on it, because we still have a week of holidays ahead of us) that’s okay and it doesn’t make you less beautiful. We don’t need to buy into pressures to look a certain way, and if you’re focus is on being balanced, caring for yourself and practicing self-love you’re on the right track to a healthy new year.

 

Your Love Is Bright As Ever

To be incredibly honest, I went to my favourite coffee shop yesterday with the intention of writing today’s blog post. I sat down in a cozy window seat ,with a tasty scone and a journal – and I planned out almost 3 months worth of post ideas. I even complied a list of inspiring friends to ask to guest write about topics that they are passionate about. But I didn’t get a single idea for today.

I procrastinated until my drink was done and left without this post even started. So last night, as I sat at my kitchen table after dinner, racking my brain for what to write about the song XO (John Mayer cover – an important detail, of course) came on my Spotify shuffle and I heard the opening lines “Your love is bright as ever // Even in the shadows” and I knew what to write…

 

Your Love Still Works

In addition to visiting my favourite coffee shop, I also went to the dentist yesterday – it was a super eventful Tuesday. As I was sitting in the chair talking to the dental hygienist I looked down at my little white Ked shoes and noticed how dirty they have gotten recently. They need to go in the wash or get replaced or something, but for now they still work. They get me where were I need to go and prevent me from going outside barefoot (most of the time). They get the job done, and this realization reminded me of a blog post I read on TWLOHA’s website earlier this year based on this tweet by their founder Jamie Tworkowski:

Screen Shot 2017-12-05 at 9.15.28 PM.png

I love this idea. I love this phrase. And as we enter a season that celebrates love and light and joy and peace, while navigating a world that can be full of hurt and sorrow and disappointment, I think it’s good to keep in mind. My Ked’s might not be the same as they were when they first came out of the box, but they have character, and they still work perfectly fine.

This year has been full of personal, local and global hurtles for just about everyone I know – but our love still works. Despite things we have faced this year, we can choose to be still be loving. We can still extend kindness to our neighbours, we can still be gracious and understanding to people who have hurt us, we can still be inclusive and open and soft to the world.

 

Be Kind To One Another

The talk show host Ellen Degeneres always ends her show by reminding her audience to “be kind to one another” and I want to do the same thing with this post. I know the holidays can quickly turn into a holi-daze of running around town trying to get through our shopping lists and prepare for gatherings.

How many Christmas movies show people fighting over the last action figure for their kid or last honey ham at the grocery store to take home to their family? Sometimes we get so swept up in getting things ready for the holidays we forget to extend patience and understanding to the people around us. It can be a stressful time and that’s super understandable – but as we focus on these wonderful things lets get so dazed that we forget to be kind to one another.

 

Merry & Bright

As snow falls become imminent, and White Christmases (or which ever holiday you celebrate!) are nearing, many of us are entering this season excited for the chance to celebrate the holidays. However, it’s been a heavy year for many and maybe it’s hard to forget about realities that might be weighing on you. I’ll encourage you, in this season of love and peace and light, to remember that despite the struggles we’ve been through this year your love is bright as ever, and desperately needed in homes and communities wherever you are in the world.

I’ll close today with wise words from Mother Teresa; “If you want to change the world, go home and love your family”.

From me to you, Happy Wednesday!

 

 


P.S. An exciting note about this post is that the organization I mentioned above, To Write Love On Her Arm’s (TWLOHA), is an incredible non-profit organization in Florida that works to present hope to people struggling with depression, addiction, self-injury, and suicide – and next month I get to move Florida to be a part of their internship program until April!

Their work has been a huge inspiration to me, they believe : “You were created to love and be loved. People need other people. Your story is important. Better days are ahead. Hope and help are real”.  I’m thrilled to be working for an organization that is an internationally recognized leader in suicide prevention and a source of hope, encouragement, and support for people worldwide.

If you’re at all interested in supporting this (unpaid) internship experience you can find more info here: https://www.gofundme.com/kaitlyns-twloha-internship

For Allison

At the beginning of the year, on a blustery cold day, I went to Balzac’s for one of many coffee dates I had this winter with my friend Allison.

We talked school, stress, heartache, and the future. Two women on the cusp of graduation feeling that “wow everyone has a job, is getting married, or going to grad school and I have no clue what my plan is” feeling.

It was a conversation that stuck with me because as I told her of the hopes and dreams I had for life after school, of programs to apply for, I said “I would really love to go do that, but I’m trying not to get my hopes up”. And I’ll always remember that she said, “But why not? Why not get your hopes up?”. This week’s post is inspired by her enthusiasm for life and her encouragement to get my hopes up.

Unlikely Dreams

Sometimes we dream unlikely dreams. And it’s easy to say “I would like that to happen but I’m going to assume it won’t because I don’t want to feel letdown when things don’t work out”. That is the safe thing to do, it keeps you from being vulnerable.

Brené Brown’s TED Talk (guys she just has realllllly amazing TED Talks – okay?) The price of invulnerability talks about why people avoid getting our hopes up and relates perfectly with today’s topic.

She speaks to the fact that “It is much easier to live disappointed than it is to feel disappointment… We sidestep getting excited about something, because we’re not sure it’s actually going to happen”. When we avoid getting our hopes up, and avoid being vulnerable to our hopes and dreams we aren’t really protecting ourselves from the disappointment.

Similar to this avoidance of vulnerability Brown also talks about “numbing” emotions, to avoid getting hurt. However, she argues it is problematic because “.. you cannot selectively numb emotion. When we numb the dark emotion, when we numb vulnerability and fear, and the shame of not being good enough, we by default numb joy. We cannot selectively just numb the dark emotions.” So essentially, if we don’t let ourselves get excited about things we do avoid the feeling of being let down, but we also avoid the excitement about cool opportunities life presents us.

Sprinting into Hope

It might be vulnerable to invest your hope into something or someone, but the truth is certainty about things evades our lives and we might never know exactly what we can get our hopes up about. Sometimes we get true signs of confirmation, like an acceptance letter that tells us we got into the program we wanted, but other times it is not so clear. Sometimes you just have to trust your gut and let yourself get excited about things.

Don’t be afraid to get your hopes up. What is the worst that will happen? You might get hurt but you will move on and find something new to be excited about. Life is good, life is exciting and full of amazing things.

To me, it’s scarier not to get my hopes up. If you don’t invest in relationships? Sure you completely avoid the possibility of getting hurt but you also avoid the possibility of community, love, and worthwhile friendships. Not pursing dreams because you’re afraid they won’t workout the way you want? It avoids the disappointment but also the possible joy and success of putting yourself out there.

If you’re reading this and you’re thinking this is completely unrealistic because there are things we really can’t predict and sometimes it doesn’t make sense to get your hopes up – you’re right. Maybe it doesn’t always make sense, but I would rather it be a habit to be optimistic and occasionally try to not get my hopes up about something than form a habit of saying “I would really love to go do that, but I’m trying not to get my hopes up”.

Love is an Action

Another thing I love about Al is that she not only encouraged me to get my hopes up about the things I wanted to be excited about (but was afraid to be), but she got her hopes up for me too. When we talk about the future she talks about those dreams as if they will really come true. And if I point out to her that the future is uncertain she tells me we’re planning on those things to happen because she believes in me.

It can be hard to be vulnerable for yourself, let alone be willing to open your heart for the benefit of others, so I am very grateful for her. There is a Jamie Tworkowski quite I really like, that goes:  “You’ll need coffee shops and sunsets and road trips. Airplanes and passports and new songs and old songs, but people more than anything else. You will need other people and you will need to be that other person to someone else, a living, breathing, screaming invitation to believe better things.” Al, I’m lucky to call you a friend and beyond thankful to have you in my life blessing me with your encouragement, love, and challenging me to believe in better things and to be the best version of myself I can be.

“Love ain’t a thing, Love is a verb”

Lets talk about em-pa-thy

Lets talk about you and me

Lets talk about all the good things and the bad things that may be

Lets talk about em-pa-thy

*jazz hands*


Empathy is one of those terms, like vulnerability, that has been popping up in my life lately. It is relevant because I think when we feel people aren’t empathetic to us it removes the willingness to be authentic and vulnerable, and essentially it has a negative impact on relationships.

Defining Empathy

One of these days I’ll write a post that doesn’t quote Brené Brown, but today is not that day, folks. In this video (its short, sweet, and if you have five minutes you should go watch it) she describes empathy as “the skill set to bring compassion alive”, and “communicating deep love for people so they know they aren’t alone”.

Brené Brown has another video called Empathy vs. Sympathy that I saw in countless classes throughout my degree, it’s brilliant and worth sharing. She talks about the important differences between being empathic and sympathetic, how empathy fuels connection and cites Theresa Wiseman’s 4 Attributes of Empathy, which are:

  1. Perspective taking
  2. Staying out of judgement
  3. Recognizing emotion in others
  4. Communicating the emotion you see

My favourite line from this video is, “Rarely if ever does an empathic response start with “at least…”.” I always think about that when I’m about to say “well at least” to someone and notice how those comments can impact people and relationships, and what better alternatives can be said that foster empathy.

Feeling WITH Others

In both of the videos I linked to above, Dr. Brown talks about “feeling with someone” and I love this language and imagery. Often, we don’t need easy solutions to challenges, we just need people to stick by our side, and let us know they understand how we’re feeling. Sometimes I think of empathy as “voluntary vulnerability”, when people say “I get it, I’ve been there too” and it requires opening themselves up to let you know that you’re not alone.

While I was writing this post I kept thinking about how the challenging experiences we go through actually enable us to be more empathetic to people. If you’ve got your heart-broken, or lost someone you love, gone through a serious illness, moved away from a place you loved, or whatever difficult things you’ve faced it actually enables you to understand and empathize with people when they go through their own hard things.

Even though life has its share of hard, sad, challenging experiences – the silver lining is that we can learn to be more empathetic and loving to people.

You can repurpose every moment of feeling hurt, let down, left out, unheard, forgotten, and use it to love people harder. You can use it to understand their struggle and to empathize with them.

But wait…

Empathy is wonderful, it grows relationships, makes people feel connected – why wouldn’t it be your go to response? The thing is empathy can be hard. One of the biggest challenges we face when practicing and discussing empathy is that if you don’t know the feeling, it is hard to empathize. You might have a friend going through something and you’ve totally been where they are, but if you’ve never experienced it what do you say? I know I’ve had experiences where I just didn’t know what to say or how to relate to what a friend was going through, but recognizing and honouring their struggle is a good place to start.

Another challenge to empathy I’ve experienced is people thinking the thing you’re going through isn’t that bad or they want you to empathize with them. A while back I was at the grocery store after working an 8 hour shift and I was staring at the sushi bar a little longer than necessary. A lady asked me if I was okay and I laughed and said “yeah I just got off work and I’m tired” and she launched into why she was more tired than me and I didn’t have a reason to be complaining.  It struck me that she wanted to make it clear that she was more entitled to feeling tired. I also thought about how exhausted she must have been for that to be her immediate reaction.

Empathy isn’t always easy, and it requires energy we might not always feel like we have but moments of empathy from strangers, or when friends surprise you with how much love and empathy they can give you, can be so meaningful and I love being on the end where I can empathize with others.

What Next?

A story of empathy that I’m inspired by is from the book Love Does by Bob Goff. He talks about being in a car accident and having someone drive through a stop sign and hit his car. But his first instinct was to go check on the other driver. It was an elderly woman and he talks about how she was worried she wouldn’t be allowed to drive anymore and he empathized with her. Now, I’ve actually been in a similar situation and empathy was not my first thought, which is why this story really strikes me. He was not angry his car was totalled, he was empathetic to a woman who might lose her license.

I think if we interact with people from a place of love, like Bob, we are able to empathize with people and connect with them in ways that are truly meaningful.

So this week’s take away?

  • Empathy does not need to be earned. If you feel like you are working to earn empathy from someone who is a big problem. If you share something with someone and they need you to share more or justify why you deserve empathy, well that’s just frustrating and they probably aren’t the best person to talk to.
  • Practice self-care to give you strength and energy to empathize and care about other people. If you don’t change your batteries you burn out and lose the ability to love people well and empathize.
  • Be as empathetic as possible to everyone you encounter